There's a fluffy piece in the Journal Sentinel today about the 15-year-old winner of the Burlington Liars Club's annual contest for "World's Champion Liar." So what was James Wilberg's masterpiece of fabulation?

"There are only three kinds of people. Those who can do math, and those who can't."

That's not even a lie, it's a joke — and one I've heard before.

Clearly, the members of the Burlington Liars Club need more experience listening to truly expert liars before they attempt to judge next year's contest. I have two suggestions:

• Patrick Buchanan, as, in the wake of Gerald Ford's death, he repeats — to sympathetic ears — the tale of how his old boss (Richard Nixon, for you young folks) was unfairly hounded from office, the victim of a coup by Democrats still angry about their 49-state loss.
• Sundry members of the Wisconsin Republican Party, local talk radio hosts, and other right-wing media figures who have successfully convinced most Wisconsin residents that there is evidence of massive voter fraud, especially in Milwaukee.

Any other nominations?