Milwaukee Alderman James Witkowiak is shocked, shocked, that escort services are advertising in the yellow pages and he wants to make sure that if they’re doing business, they’re licensed.

Complaining about them operating without a license in the City of Milwaukee is both silly and ridiculous. To then hold a press conference where he said, “I put provisions in place that should any application be made for an escort service in the city of Milwaukee, ah, there will be notifications sent out to ah, all the neighbors giving them a chance to respond. Ah, I’m sure there’s not too many people in the city of Milwaukee that would want that sort of business run in their neighborhood or next door to them”.

In the interview, Witkowski is flanked by a smiling elderly man whose virility is likely just a distant memory.

Am I the only one that sees this for what it is — a pre-election stunt by a politician right before the election who wants a little face time in front of the camera? The election is just two weeks away. Witkowiak has never been high profile. In fact, I can’t think of a time he has ever been on the televised news. So who bites on something like this two weeks before an election? What kind of a news room actually thinks this is newsworthy? What kind of news room would consider this so important that they would make it their “top story”? Well Fox “news” of course.

I always appreciate when politicians actually do something newsworthy but here’s a politician who is decrying the lack of businesses having licenses on one hand and with the other hand saying that when they apply, he’s going to make sure they don’t get one. Now how bright is that? Is it newsworthy? Come on now people, you can do better than that. I know there’s real news out there. I’ve seen it in the making and there weren’t any reporters willing to cover it.

We all know why Fox is covering this non-story; it’s because of the sex. If County Supervisors had a hottie do a pole dance amidst a real issue that affects real people, perhaps they could get coverage for some of the things they might do that is in the public interest. And if that doesn’t do it, maybe the Supervisors themselves would join in — although I fear that might scare off some.

This is really a non-issue. If it were a real issue, Witkowiak would be going after all of the retailers and home improvement companies in the big yellow book that are operating without a license. I would venture that it’s a majority.

But back to the hookers — I mean the escorts. What makes Witkowiak think that these escorts are bringing people back to their own homes for a little hibbidy-dibbidy? C’mon Alderman, you know that’s not how it works. Any adult male knows these escorts do their business and return to their own homes at the end of the night. It’s really in-home sales like vacuum cleaner sales only with more… well let’s not go there.

But just to recap for those of who aren’t quite understanding why Fox considered this little pre-election publicity stunt news, keeping in mind that the Alderman hopes to glide right in to his seat in two weeks, Witkowiak is upset that these businesses aren’t licensed but if they do try to get a license, he will oppose them.

Whew, I’m glad that one’s all cleared up.