Let's break down what President George W. Bush said tonight with not only what was said, but what was meant and what his track record is.

We must balance the budget.

Despite the fact that I've supported the largest deficit in our nations history. 

Will eliminate the deficit within the next 5 years.

Uh, do as I say, not as I do? 

Expose all earmarks to the light of day. 

(Uh, where was he on this when he had 6 years of a Republican congress.)

Build on the success of "No child left behind" by giving local leaders flexibility and by giving children stuck in failing schools the right to choose some place better.

Yeah, we get it.  You want to undermine public schools and give more money to churches to indoctrinate children with public money.  It's just another pitch for choice schools that we've heard before. 

All our citizens must have affordable and available health care.  Government has a responsibility to care for the elderly, disabled and our children.  For the rest of Americans, private health insurance is the best means to achieve those goals.

Yeah, right.  Six years of having a rubber stamp congress and now you want the Democrats to do the hard work?  So you start out your speech by saying you won't raise taxes and you are going to pay for this how?

We need to expand health savings accounts.

We need more people to pay for their own health care costs.

We need to pass medical liability reform.

So if you get injured by medical negligence or malpractice, you should have to rely on a wooden stick and a few band-aids because don't expect those that harmed you to have to pay.

We're doubling the size of the border control.

Because we need to keep those brown people out?  Is that it Mr. President?

We need to welcome and assimilate new arrivals (immigrants).

Sounds more like the Borg than a welcoming tent.

We must have clean, safe, nuclear power.

Uh… Chernobyl… (while Chernobyl may not be a perfect analogy, Bush still has not addressed what we would do with all of the nuclear waste which is a byproduct of creating nuclear power. So far, his solution has meant storing it in arid states in the southwest. That solution is a bit like storing urine in jars next to your bed but saying it’s not a health problem because you put the lid of the jar.)

We must use wood chips, grasses and agricultural wastes to create ethanol.

Reduce gasoline usage by 20% in the next 10 years.

Because I'm only going to be in office for 2 of those 10 years and I know there's no way that will happen.

Conserve more gas by 2017.

But not now since I, an oilman, don't want to make those tough decisions in the next 2 years.

Blah blah blah "global climate change".

Whuuuuhhh?  Did a Republican actually admit that there is such a thing as global warming?

My nominees for the federal bench have the right to a prompt up or down vote on the Senate floor.

I've successfully screwed the democrats for 6 years.  Now that my party isn't in power anymore, it's time for the dems to roll over and give me what I want for the next two years also.

In the war on terror, we must take the fight to the enemy.

Where?  Iraq?  Syria?  Surely he can't mean kicking the terrorists butts in Afghanistan because he's disinvested in the fight against terrorism there.

I ask you to give our (my) new strategy a chance and I ask you to support our troops.

Yeah, I know I've been calling the democrats unpatriotic haters of the military for six years.  Big deal and I ask you to support our troops.  Get over it and I ask you to support our troops.

I ask you to authorize increasing the size of the active army and marine corp by 92,000 in the next 5 years.

And you can pay for it by freezing taxes… yeah, that's the ticket.  Yep, I know I didn't support an increase for 6 years while my party enjoyed a power orgy, but democrats should do all the heavy lifting.

A democratic Palestinian state next to Israel living in peace.

Or we'll bomb them too… once we're done in Iraq that is.

Blah blah blah… Darfur.

Huh?  Is he going to actually do something about the genocide?  Here's me holding my breath.

We can go forward with confidence because the state of our union is strong, our cause in the world is right, and tonight that cause goes on.  God Bless.

Good to end on a positive note but…

It was interesting to see all the democrats gushing and begging for Bush to sign their copies of the State of the Union address. Will they now forget that they're in a different party or will they roll over and line up to kiss the President's ring?